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REVIEW | Madame Web is nowhere near as memorably awful as you've heard

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Dakota Johnson In 'Madame Web'.
Dakota Johnson In 'Madame Web'.
Supplied/Sony Pictures

After a near-lethal accident, paramedic Cassandra Webb (Dakota Johnson) develops powers to see the future. When she glimpses a vision of a super-powered "spider-person" viciously murdering three teenage girls, she becomes embroiled in a larger plot – one with ties to her own past and these strange powers she suddenly developed.

As far as I can tell, international reviews for Madame Web dropped just about the time I was in the cinema watching it, and boy, were there some doozies. Fans and critics alike seemed finally to be on the same page, calling the film "hilariously bad", "one of the worst pictures ever", and, most damningly, "worse than Moebius".

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